La Lluvia!!!! Rainy Friday Nights

Tired.  Stressed.  Shaking.  Unable to Drive.   On A Friday Night?    I’m so accustomed to driving myself anywhere and have driven on so many roads in all kinds of cities and streets,  have gotten lost big time while I was alone,  so I thought that I had pretty much been “curada de espantos” no longer afraid of going anywhere, of driving anywhere, alone or not.   However, on certain Friday nights, this is no longer the case…

On Jan 6, 2006, on a Friday night, when it was raining, and I was tired from having driven all day from Los Angeles, and was on the way from the Ranch to Pleasanton, my new white Jeep got into a bad accident with a semi-truck on 205 in Tracy.   Car was totaled and I ended up with two broken hands.  I never really thought about flashback attacks until I started getting them … turns out that it was always on a Friday night and always between 7 and 9 at night.

As it had been raining all day and into the night, I stayed an extra hour in Oakland trying to wait out the rain … and my anxiety.  Got on 580 and the nerves, shakes, flashback style driving:  swerving rapidly and nervously jumpy driving … tried calling EVERYONE I could think of to talk me down off of my ledge, thankfully, got a hold of my Mom and my sisters. who told me to get off of the road…

So here I sit, watching the rain, in one of my favorite places:  Starbucks, no surprise here LOL.  So instead of watching the rain thrash around as I did when I was driving in the pic above…I am now being calmed by the raindrops as they fall out of the huge window in front of me, watching people walk thru the rain with more smiles than stress on their faces…I’ll kick it here for a while more, listening to music, smelling cafe, writing, and calming myself down enough to eventually get back on the road toward my house and my comfortable “cama” bed!

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