Handling Hard Decisions and Inner Chingona

I often wonder:  what the hell happened in 2012?  This has so not been my year!   You name it, it has happened.    I have been put to the test time and time and time and time again in every single aspect of my life this year.  Yes, I have shed huge amounts of tears,  beat up my steering wheel so many times, banged my head in frustration and shouted, “why?”.

But the one thing that I learned, more than anything, is that a combination of things have helped me get thru this mess of 2012:  my familia, friends, God, and, yes, Inner Chingona.    Inner Chingona reminds me, straight-up, that I do matter in this world, that, no matter what, I need to hold my head high and make my life happen for myself.   In the past 72 hours, I have had to drink some serious ‘tragos amargos’ which included shame, embarrassment, humiliation, disgust, anger, and everything in between.   I could have let these situations bring me down and drag me along for an even uglier ride — but Inner Chingona again threw it in my face that I am better than any negative situation or person — that it is better to be nervous, a little afraid, but alive and grateful!

Three more months left of 2012…gonna strive to make the final quarter of the year one of healing, getting my power back, and moving forward…instead of shame, I want to feel confident;  instead of embarrassment, I want to be proud of who I am and what I do, instead of humiliation, let’s try dedication to putting myself in positive situations with positive people; instead of disgust, I want to embrace the good in life, instead of anger – let’s try happiness.   I’ve spent 2012 reacting to and making decisions based on others … quite frankly, tired of living like this – it’s time to be nervous and a little afraid as I  embrace good instead of expecting bad…and time to be grateful for new beginnings …

 Working my way back🙂

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