Inner Chingona Al Rescate Helping Me Tragar El Coraje: Biting your tongue even when the client is NOT right.


I will not go into great detail here but a client, who shall remain nameless, who did not like the fact that “I asked for the order” — told me straight up that I may be that bold in Latin radio but not in General Market radio. Whaaaat?

Suffice it to say, I was in shock.

First, that I’m getting called out on doing my job, that this person likely deals with hundreds of people who ask for an order. Am I to assume that Latinos have no business asking for anything? that we are to take what is left and to take it with a smile? Second, to add to my shock, I almost laughed in this person’s face for a number of reasons: What state do we live in? How many Latinos live in the great state of California? Uuuuummmm, the likelihood of another Latino asking this person for an order is almost a given. Was it because I wasn’t a man? What? So much racism and sexism exists to this day in my business that I would be sick every day of the week if I let it get to me. It just amazes me that people THINK that they can get away with this type of attitude and behavior in business and expect to be applauded for it — well not by this woman, not today.

I decided to completely take the high road and thank this person for letting me know how they prefer to do business. No ‘vete mucho a la ch#$%^&*’ or ‘middle finger up attitude’ when I responded. And, NO, I did NOT apologize for asking for the order either.

What did I get in return?

A nice note telling me not to take offense and this person laid out in detail how they prefer to do business. All that needs to be said. While, again, I did not apologize for doing my job, a simple, ‘no te apures/no worries’ response was all I needed to do. One should always try to respond, as intelligently as possible, to crazy stuff like this. But I love knowing that, sometimes, Inner Chingona helps me handle it in a smooth, diplomatic way and saves me from throwing chingazos when there was no need to do so … not this time anyway LOL.

ASK for what you need. If you have to ask for forgiveness, not permission, do it sin miedo/don’t be afraid.


2 thoughts on “Inner Chingona Al Rescate Helping Me Tragar El Coraje: Biting your tongue even when the client is NOT right.

  1. guuurrrllll, u know that califas is hella oppressive to most latinos, even the ones that wanna forget that they be brown. i know i’m talking in generalities, but do some anecdotal inquiries, and u’ll find that many of us living “la vida latino/;mexicana” en cali feel this way; i know all my homies do!!

    desgraciadamente, nosotros, in our efforts to “fit in” and be “hard workes” tenemos la culpa. how many years have i been called hostile or “difficult” to work with, simply cuz i insisted on being regarded as a full human when engaging in the world or at work? i tell u mana, as long as we, and i’m speaking primarily bilingual (eng./span) and spanish-speakers, “allow” ourselves to be regarded as sub-human to the the english speaker, ain’t nothin’ gonna change!!

    my experience in cali, no mattah how “progressive” we claim to be, is that we such at being an inclusive, accepting society that genuinely believes in “celebrating diversity”–puro pinche pedo!! indeed, it appears that a common phenomenon is actively in place in califas—the clearer it becomes to the english speaker that spanish-speakers, and their u.s.-born familia, grown in number, the more aggressive the “denial” of our basic human rights. this “response” to change in demographics has occurred time and again in this country’s young history.

    latinos (this includes womyn and men) in calif, and the u.s. in general, need to formulate our own identity; we need to be clear on how all brown folk here, legal or otherwise, are connected to each other and that no mattah how much u may wanna escape the fact that u got abuelitos y tios y what not, someone will always remind u that ur a “mexican” cuz ur name is jose. hell, u many be a boriqua or costa ricense (sp?), but if u in cali, u a mexican.

    not surprised, in 2013, that u were regarded in the way that u were with the tone and commentary (not doen business in spanish media, etc.). u know ur value as a trained, educated latina; ur verbal and direct; and u know what information ur supposed to be able to secure. the person receiving the information was not amused for u were stepping out of ur “expected” work behavior. what fools like this one don’t get is that we’re here; we ain’t goen nowhere; and the “feeder” countries for most of our latino peeps in this country is right next door. iss not that we’re (latinos) special or nothin’ like that; isssolll about proximity, hunger, and the need for getting our basic needs met. the sooner “united stadians” get it, the sooner we can get on with the business of all of us “contributing” to a functional and affirmative life–ALL OF US!!

    bueno chika, te me cuidas, eh? u keep doen what u do cuz it has worked for u for many, many years; me, ima go chill by the pool cuz today is “yacuzzi friday”—yaaayyyy!! today’s high is like 94 degrees y apenas estamos el 15 de marzo. how awesome is that dude? i love it!! ok, bye. 2bro4life.

  2. Ya me calme Jorge because I did recognize, and more important, the cliente recognized, the fire that was stepped into which could have been worse had I really gone off…Now I just think that it’s funny when ‘good ‘ol boys and girls’ try to throw their arrogant and misguided weight around and totally expect us latinos to ‘sit, run, and jump’ cuando se les antoje. I’ve also learned that one must choose her battles wisely and, if lucky, can watch the show unfold as karma takes over.

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